The Poet X pt.2

     As I continued to read on in The Poet X, I found myself sympathizing with the main character, Xiomara. She continually had to go through struggle after struggle and finally felt completely knocked down when her strict, Catholic mother found out that she was in a relationship with a boy at age 16. As if this was not enough, her mother found her poetry book that held all of Xiomara's deepest secrets. It explained how she felt about boys and most importantly and consequently, her mother. I felt myself wanting to try to save Xiomara from the turmoil that was overtaking her life.
      We all have that one thing that keeps us feeling alive. Poetry was Xiomara's thing. It kept her head above water when she felt like she was drowning in a sea of despair and disappointment. She could always rely on poetry as an outlet to release all of her frustrations in her life. She felt like the paper was the only thing that was up for the challenge of facing her deepest, darkest feelings and that paper took a metaphorical beating every day. I believe that writing can be cathartic for some individuals who do not feel like they have anyone to go to when they are feeling the weight of the world on their shoulders. This is something I want to share with my future students. Writing how you feel is a positive way to get out your thoughts and feelings out so that it does not eat you up inside.
     Just as Xiomara thought she was going to get a break, her mother found her most prize possession. As Xiomara walked into her home, her mother was standing there with it in her hand. Her mother reached for a lighter and began to light the book on fire. As the author described the smell of burning leather and Xiomara's overwhelming emotions, I found myself wanting to reach and grab the book out of her mother's hands. That was Xiomara's lifeline. I could not imagine the intensity of this situation and how Xiomara felt. She was distraught.
     After this traumatic event, Xiomara was able to pick herself back up. She attended slam poetry sessions where she had the opportunity to share her own poems. She found out that her poems were in her heart and that she did not need the book. She found out that she could take her poems to the next level by performing them. As teachers, we could be responsible for introducing a passion to a child. A teacher noticed that Xiomara had a real talent and passion for poetry and encouraged her to join poetry club. When we teach, taking notes about what our students enjoy and are good at can really make a difference. We could supply them with a little bit of encouragement and confidence that could change their lives.

The Poet X

     Before I started reading this novel by Elizabeth Acevedo, I looked at the cover and saw the word "poet." I thought to myself "this will be a challenge." I am not a huge fan of poetry and this is 375 pages full of it. A whole novel. To say the least, I was skeptical. Whenever I think of poetry, I always think of it as something I will find difficult to read and something that will most likely not benefit me to read. I know it's harsh, but that was my experience from high school and even prior to high school. To my surprise, this novel proved me wrong.
     As I was reading, I found myself enjoying how fast it was to read, how easy it was to follow, and how the content pulled me in. This novel is about a teenage girl who is experiencing new thoughts, feelings, and ideas all while under the strict control of her Catholic parents. She is always torn. She is always deciding with three factors in mind-- her feelings, her mom's feelings, and God's feelings. She feels immense pressure to act a certain way in her community and is forced to conceal who she really is. This is a daily struggle for her. I wondered how long she could take this piling pressure before she would rebel or hide any trace of who she really is just to appease the people surrounding her. While I was reading, I thought about how many people are in the same position as her. So many people struggle with issues like this and many could find solace in finding out that someone else is going through a hardship just like them.
     While I was reading, I found a poem that I think a lot of people can relate to. In this poem, called "On Papi," she describes her father's role that he plays in her life. The best way to sum up the poem and her relationship with her father is in the final line. It states, "Just because your father's present doesn't mean he isn't absent" (p.65). When I read this, I thought about how many kids, even adults too, could relate to this line. She feels like her dad is there in her physical life, but always vacant in her emotional life. He is there in their home every day, but he could be a stranger and she would not know the difference. This makes me very sad. It seems like we live in a world now where it is rare that a father is involved in his child's life. I always think about this when I hear children talk about their parents and how they are not around and how I want to do something, anything, to make them feel better.
   

Wilbur, Wilbur, Wilbur

     When I found this book boxed up at my parents house, I felt sad that I had left it behind when I moved out. This book is such a classic. I did not know that the author who wrote this book also wrote Stuart Little! No wonder I really liked both of those stories and the movies they were later on developed into. Most of us have read Charlotte's Web, heard of it, or maybe even saw the movie. As I began reading, it was all coming back to me. I remember being jealous that Fern had a little pig as a pet. He looked so cute! I really wanted a little pig of my own.
     I love the way Fern was so compassionate and persistent about Wilbur. A pig she had never met or seen before. It really reminded me how kids are so caring about things they love and, at all cost, will protect the thing that they truly have passion for. Fern is so headstrong and caring. This is a great combination that sometimes results in stubbornness. This can be good and also bad at the same time. For Fern, it paid off. She got a new little friend to take care of and nurture. I wondered how she made her father change his perspective about Wilbur. He was so sure that they were going to get rid of him because he was not useful, but Fern changed his mind and won him over. I think that she made him really look at Fern's perspective and find at least a little compassion for her and this animal. As adults, we can learn so much from children. They are sometimes our teachers too and it is important to keep this in mind as future teachers. Sometimes we think kids are dramatic, but they are just passionate. When Fern is trying to save Wilbur and her father tells her to control herself, Fern screams, "This is a matter of life and death, and you talk about controlling myself" (p.2). She is trying to show just how much she cares for this little pig and its life.
     I wonder if her father let her keep the pig so she could learn more about responsibility. If he was trying to test her, she definitely passed with flying colors! She fed that pig three times a day and treated him like he was her baby. I think this speaks volumes to what kids are capable of if they put their whole heart into it and love it. I think that even if she did fail, she still would have learned a value lesson about responsibility. All children need to learn this and one way they learn is by failing.

   
   

Turns Out, It Was Just a Rough Day!

As I continue reading this story that repeatedly takes me down memory lane, I notice that I can relate to it more and more. Katie and I are one and the same. And I'm not saying this is particularly a good thing. I think we both look at situations with a "worse case scenario" approach. So, we always prepare for the worst, but maybe, just maybe, hope for the best. Maybe not even the best. Maybe just a little bit better than the worst. Let's just say, in some situations, we are not the most optimistic. Maybe it's just called being a "worrier." This is exactly how Katie felt when her first day of fourth grade was approaching.
     Turns out, to both of our surprises, it wasn't all that bad! She ended up liking her new, mysterious teacher, Mr. Guthrie, reconnecting with one of her old friends from kindergarten, and eating gummy worms covered in chocolate pudding--all in one day! I felt relieved when Katie did not have the terrible day that she probably stayed up all night worrying about. Although it was better than expected, it definitely was not perfect. She is approaching a time in her life where she will either lose friends, make new friends, or keep the same ones. Which one will it be?
     I wondered if Suzanne was still going to try to make their friendship work even though they were in different classes. Unfortunately, it does not look like it. She seems to have found a new best friend in her class, Jessica Haynes. Every time Katie would talk, Suzanne would interrupt her. I can't believe that Suzanne would treat her this way. When they were exchanging stories about their days, Katie thinks in her head, "Suzanne would probably just come up with something they did in her class that was even more wonderful" (p. 39). I really began to wonder why Katie was even friends with Suzanne at all. Suzanne was not treating Katie like a friend. She was treating her like an outsider just because they weren't in the same class this year. I found myself wanting to look at Katie in the eyes and tell her, "Friends do not treat friends this way. You do not have to keep being friends just because you have been friends for years." This happens to a lot of people, including myself. It is easy to stay friends with someone just because you have been friends with them for a long time, but when they start treating you this way, you really need to reassess the friendship and figure out why you really are still friends with this person. 
     I hope that Katie and Suzanne can work out their friendship and figure out what is going on. Katie seems to be having a good year so far, despite the situation with Suzanne. Let's hope she continues to have a good year!